Someday My Prince Will…Get Crushed By a Horse, Thereby Ruining That Whole MLS Designated Player Experiment

By: Laurie | January 28th, 2007

As you’ve probably read by now, David Beckham is Prince Charming. At least as far as Disney is concerned. He recently finished a photo shoot for a Disney ad where he rides a horse. And, according to the video, slays a dragon, too. (I guess he must need the money.)

If I were LA Galaxy Owner Phil Anschutz, though, I’d be beyond pissed at the sight of this photo. (If you’ll remember, Phil is the guy who’s on the hook for probably about $48 million in salary for David Beckham over the next five years in MLS’s first big designated player gamble.)

I’m a former horse person. (Meaning: I haven’t touched a horse in years yet still feel quite comfortable seeing humor in watching Hollywood types trying to pretend they can ride.) And I have to say, this photo and video make my jaw drop. What the hell were these people thinking?!?! Putting a $250 million non-horseman on a high-spirited horse for the sake of Disney photos? This horse is something like six inches from going over backwards and falling on top of our Becks. And when this happens… Well, let’s just say the laws of physics are not your friends.

Beckham obviously has way too much time on his hands in Madrid. Let’s get him over here ASAP so he can get back on the field and out of danger, okay?

And Prince David? Let’s try slaying those dragons on foot next time, shall we?

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Category: Just for Fun, Player News

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Laurie

Sam, you're right. I am SO a mom when it comes to these things!! I'm also quite offended that Prince Charming doesn't wear a riding helmet, even though I NEVER wore one in my misspent Colorado cowgirl youth.

The funny thing is, I've watched the video a few more times and I'm actually pretty impressed. He rides it just right. Heels stay down (well, okay, kind of), he bends forward at the hips, his body moves with the horse... No panic whatsoever. I'm trying to decide if he rides in real life, or if this is just comes naturally when you use your body for a living.
Martha

Just so you know, this was covered on the Italian news today right before the Inter game. And it wasn't even sports news. I'm pretty sure a (fully-clothed) Beckham ad being of serious interest to the international media is a sign of apocalypse.
Sam

Heehee, what a little joker. I must say, you aren't kidding when you appoint yourself team mom, are you! Davey, get down from that horse! You'll hurt yourself! ;)

In response to your comment, I know the stock market isn't the worst thing that could happen in comparison to other things, but that day I was just in a sadistic state of mind after seeing all the Platini headlines, and watching a few videos about Nike sweatshops and the like...

The thing is, going public is a good thing in Lyon or Marseille or Paris' case, but you have to go back in time and everything from then on revolves around money money and more money.

When I look at all that's happened, all the dollars and euros and pounds passed around, I just get sick of it all.

But for every bad thing there's a good side... I hope... sigh...